Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Blended Families - The Merging Of Yours And Mine

!±8± Blended Families - The Merging Of Yours And Mine

A blended family is formed by the merging through official or common-law marriage of two or more family remnants of previous marriages or family constellations. At least one of the spouses has been in a parental role in a previous family system and brings to the blended family a child or children from that union. Blended families vary considerably in composition. The children may belong to the wife or husband by a previous family union or may be theirs by the present arrangement. Inasmuch as custody is ordinarily awarded to the mother, the typical blended unit consists of a wife, her children, and the husband, whose children, if he has any, reside with their mother.

With the growing popularity of joint custody and the rising number of serial family relationships, blended family configurations are becoming increasingly varied and complex. Many children now belong to two households, dividing their time equally between both. In some families children from two or more previous marriages retain their paternal surnames. Hence, numerous last names may be used within the same family, affecting the bonding and identity formation process significantly.

Blended families may be extended families with exponentially complicated structures, though the term is normally used mainly to refer to newly formed nuclear families that are made up of integrated subsystems from previous family units. The principal challenge of the blended family is to develop into a cohesive unit. Yet it must be defined by boundaries that allow appropriate contact with what frequently is a large, disjointed network of relatives in the new extended family. These families must negotiate several critical developmental tasks in order to coalesce.

One task faced by all the members is the mourning of the lost families they represent. Family failures and breakup are severe emotional trauma, and this loss requires substantial grieving if one is to be prepared for investment in new relationships. Blended families frequently arise from relationships motivated by the rebound from former relationships in an effort to escape the pain of the loss, loneliness, and shame about failure. Though one may have accepted cognitively the termination of a previous family union by death or divorce, the new relationship symbolizes the old loss and failure. Out of loyalty to the new relationship one may repress that grief/loss but that merely constipates and subverts the residual grief. It will surface in some destructive way at a later point.

This grief experience may be particularly true for children, who often grieve long after the family breakup. This is seen in the persistent longing to be reunited with the absent parent and in the enduring fantasy that the child's mother and father will eventually remarry. It is also manifested in the refusal of some children to form a relationship in the new family constellation or with the stepparent. Unfinished grief tends to skew the child's loyalty toward the natural parent exclusively. This usually produces destructive counterforces in the entire family constellation. Unresolved grief is poison to the blended family. It produces intrafamilial tension and siphons off emotional energy that could otherwise be channeled into strengthening family relationships. Professional help is frequently needed to resolve this type of mourning because of its insidious character.

A critical developmental task for spouses is to form a strong marital bond. Continued contact with the ex-spouse and former in-laws, for example, in the course of normal child visitation, can be disruptive to developing the new spousal relationship. Issues of jealousy, trust, and loyalty are easily activated by these continuing contacts. Yet the cornerstone of the blended family is the quality of the new spousal union. Moreover, one dimension of this spousal union is the development of a co-parent partnership of care for each other's children that is strong enough to withstand repeated counterforce dynamics injected by the children, who are likely still to have their own unresolved and pathological agenda to act out or resolve. Children accept the stepparent more readily if their natural parent demonstrates unwavering commitment to the spousal relationship and its long-term viability. Children often create conflict between the parent and stepparent, maneuvering for the natural parent's support. Feelings of loyalty and guilt on the part of the parent, particularly regarding having failed the child by failing in the earlier relationship, tempt the parent to side with the child against the new spouse. This kind of triangulation is always destructive.

Maintaining a "mine/yours" view of the children undermines the stepparent-stepchild relationship. It places the stepparent in the untenable position of having to borrow authority from the natural parent when dealing with stepchildren. This obstructs the process of true blending between the new spouses as well as between all the members of the new family constellation. Triangulation produces divisiveness.

Moreover, building functional stepsibling relationships is complicated by the fact that the ordinal position among siblings and the entire structure of the genogram for the new family will change extensively with the merging of the family remnants into the blended family. Rivalry with siblings may decrease as that family remnant closes ranks for this new experience, but stepsibling rivalry often increases, painfully changing the roles, identities, and self-perceptions of all the children. A related issue for blended families with adolescent or young adult progeny living in the home as part of the family constellation is the fact that children who could be dating are living together as siblings. Sexual boundaries are usually weak, as blended families may not have well-established inherent incest taboos. Conflict and rivalry are ways in which teenage stepsiblings define boundaries to protect themselves from the anxiety and threat of excessive intimacy. Many blended families achieve well-adjusted and harmonious relationships, though the usual critical adjustment time frame is two to four years.


Blended Families - The Merging Of Yours And Mine

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Friday, October 14, 2011

Preventing Excavation Collapse

!±8± Preventing Excavation Collapse

Every year people excavating or working in excavations are injured and killed. If you're one of these people then there are some things you need to know and things you need to do if you're going to stay safe.

Soils Ain't Soils

Despite how it appears, not all soils are the same and, if you think about it, you probably already know that. Soils are mixtures of clay, sand and rock and different combinations of these create soil with different characteristics. Here's a rough guide to identifying the type of soil you maybe working with:

Clay......Very Soft Clay........................................ Easily penetrated 40mm with fist

...........Soft Clay................................................Easily penetrated 40mm with thumb

...........Firm Clay................................................Moderate effort needed to penetrate 30mm with thumb

...........Stiff Clay................................................Readily indented with thumb but penetrated only with great effort.

...........Very Stiff Clay.........................................Readily indented by thumbnail.

...........Hard Clay...............................................Indented with difficulty by thumbnail

Sand....Loose Clean Sand....................................Takes footprint more than 10mm deep.

..........Medium-Dense Clean Sand.........................Takes footprint 3mm to 10mm deep

..........Dense Clean Sand....................................Takes footprint less than 3mm deep

..........or Gravel.

Rock....Broken or Decomposed..............................Diggable. Hammer blow "thuds". The joints (breaks in the rock) are spaced less than 300mm apart.

..........Sound Rock.............................................Not diggable with pick. Hammer blow "rings". The joints (breaks in the rock) are spaced more than 300mm apart.

The Angle of What?

A pile of excavated soil (or spoil as it's known) will have a different natural slope according to the type of soil. This is called the "angle of repose". The approximate angle s for different soil types are:

Soil Type..........................................................................................................................Slope Ratio...............Slope Angle.........(Width to Height)

Granular soils: crushed rock, gravel, non-angular, poorly graded sand, loamy sand..............1.5:1........................34

Weak cohesive soils: angular well graded sand, silt, silty loam, sandy loam..........................1:1...........................45

Cohesive soils: clay, silty clay, sandy clay...........................................................................0.75:1.......................53

The angle of repose is a good gauge for estimating the angle of shear planes in the soil profile - shear planes are the lines through which the unexcavated soil forming the excavation walls may break. We want to minimise the pressure on this area of potential weakness and the angle of repose allows us to estimate the distance that equipment and materials need to be from the edge of the excavation to reduce the chance of the excavation wall breaking. For example, the angle of repose for sandy loam soil is 1:1 so equipment and materials need to be the depth of the excavation away from edge of the excavation. In a 2 metre (just over 6 feet) deep excavation in sandy loam soil equipment and materials should be no closer than 2 metres from the edge of the excavation. If we were excavating in rocky soils the ratio is 1.5:1 so the distance is 3 metres and for clay soils, 1.5 metres.

Be aware that this angle will reduce if the soil is wet and more so if it's saturated so always err on the side of caution.

Ground Support Systems

That's a nice piece of jargon, so what does it mean? Essentially these are work practices to be followed where the risk of ground collapse is unacceptably high. This would include all excavations more than 1.5 metres (5 feet) deep and even lesser depths where the soil is loose such as sandy soils or when it's wet or where there's been previous excavations or a stack of other things that may reduce the strength of the excavation walls. There are 3 generally accepted methods for preventing excavations collapsing:

Battering involves sloping the sides of the excavation to the angle of repose thereby removing the soil that is likely to fall into the excavation.

Benching is cutting the side walls of the excavation into steps of the same ratio as the angle of repose with no vertical face being more than a metre (3 feet) high.

Shoring requires mechanical devices to be inserted into the excavation to strengthen the side walls and prevent it from collapsing. There are different types of shoring available for different circumstances and expert advice should be obtained to make sure you get the right type and its installed in the right way.

Warning Signs

Soils can dry out or become sodden or change in other ways that increases the risk of collapse. All excavations should be inspected at least twice a day to monitor changing soil conditions and the effect this has on the stability of the walls. Some of the warning signs to watch out for are:

TENSION CRACKS appearing in the wall of the excavation or existing cracks getting larger.

SLIDING usually happens in loose soil and is indicated by soil from the side wall sliding into the excavation.

TOPPLING describes a situation where large blocks of soil fall from the walls into the excavation.

SUBSIDENCE AND BULGING of the side wall indicate unbalanced stresses in the soil.

HEAVING OR SQUEEZING is where the floor of the excavation starts to bulge as a result of the pressure from the walls of the excavation.

BOILING happens when the excavation has cut into the water table or the water table has risen causing water to pool in the excavation.

Where these things are detected work should stop and expert advice obtained about corrective steps to take to prevent collapse.

Appearances can be Deceptive

How a soil looks on the surface is probably not a good indication of what it is like below the surface.

Soil types can vary within an area and different soil types can be found along the length of an excavation.

Because there are no signs of previous excavation doesn't mean there hasn't been any. Previous excavation adjacent to where you're digging will reduce soil integrity possibly leading to the collapse of the excavation walls.

Not all buried services are marked (this is more so with the advent of underground boring for below ground service placement) - always locate underground services before starting to dig.

Never assume what type of soil you're working with or that things will stay the same during the life of the job. If you don't know - find out and take the steps necessary to prevent yourself and those you're working with from becoming a story on the local news because you've been buried in an excavation.


Preventing Excavation Collapse

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Sunday, October 2, 2011

Coal Seam Gas - The Fight For Our Lives - Spread Virally

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